HELLO EVERYONE!

WE HOPE YOU'VE EXCUSED OUR SUMMER MISHAPS, BECAUSE GROTTO G.S.M. INC. IS BRINGING YOU A BRAND NEW EXPERIENCE FOR THE UPCOMING SCHOOL YEAR!
WHILE IN THE PAST WE HAVE SPONSORED QUALITY CLASSES, WE HAVE DECIDED TO TAKE A NEW APPROACH TO EMPOWERING AND HELPING THE STUDENT BODY!

WE ARE LAUNCHING GROTTO G.S.M. SPONSORED STUDENT SAFETY AND EMPOWERMENT AND PATROL CLUB, OR GGSMSSSAEAPC FOR SHORT!!!!!!!!!!

NOW WE CAN'T TELL YOU EVERYTHING JUST YET!! BUT....
YOU CAN START AN APPLICATION NOW!
TO BE A PART OF THE GGSMSSASEAPC YOU NEED TO TURN IN AN APPLICATION TO THE UNDISCLOSED GROTTO SECURITY OFFICERS THEN HAVE AN INTERVIEW WITH PROFESSOR ACHAVA BRANIGAN.
(PROF. BRANIGAN WILL BE A SUB FOR MANY OF YOUR CLASSES THIS YEAR, AS WELL AS THE STUDENT LEADER FOR THE GGSMSSEACP.)

THE GSGMSESCPA WILL DOING DORM CHECKS, HELP STUDENTS WITH ISSUES IN THEIR DORM, MONITOR HALLS, AND MANY OTHER FUN ACTIVITIES. BEING A PART OF THE GASOMGLMAO WILL GO TOWARDS A GALAXATON CREDIT OR A INTERNSHIP CERTIFICATION.

BEING IN THE GHJHJHFSJHLKCPA WILL NOT ONLY GIVE YOU WORK EXPERIENCE, BUT A NEW COMMUNITY AND NEW SKILLS.

APPLICATIONS WILL BE RELEASED SHORTLY.

HELLO EVERYONE!

WE HOPE YOU'VE EXCUSED OUR SUMMER MISHAPS, BECAUSE GROTTO G.S.M. INC. IS BRINGING YOU A BRAND NEW EXPERIENCE FOR THE UPCOMING SCHOOL YEAR!
WHILE IN THE PAST WE HAVE SPONSORED QUALITY CLASSES, WE HAVE DECIDED TO TAKE A NEW APPROACH TO EMPOWERING AND HELPING THE STUDENT BODY!

WE ARE LAUNCHING GROTTO G.S.M. SPONSORED STUDENT SAFETY AND EMPOWERMENT AND PATROL CLUB, OR GGSMSSSAEAPC FOR SHORT!!!!!!!!!!

NOW WE CAN'T TELL YOU EVERYTHING JUST YET!! BUT....
YOU CAN START AN APPLICATION NOW!
TO BE A PART OF THE GGSMSSASEAPC YOU NEED TO TURN IN AN APPLICATION TO THE UNDISCLOSED GROTTO SECURITY OFFICERS THEN HAVE AN INTERVIEW WITH PROFESSOR ACHAVA BRANIGAN.
(PROF. BRANIGAN WILL BE A SUB FOR MANY OF YOUR CLASSES THIS YEAR, AS WELL AS THE STUDENT LEADER FOR THE GGSMSSEACP.)

THE GSGMSESCPA WILL DOING DORM CHECKS, HELP STUDENTS WITH ISSUES IN THEIR DORM, MONITOR HALLS, AND MANY OTHER FUN ACTIVITIES. BEING A PART OF THE GASOMGLMAO

HELLO EVERYONE

WE... WE WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE...FOR UM... COVERING EVERYONE IN A PLASTIC SEAL AND TRAPPING STUDENTS IN A BUBBLE FACILITY.
AFTER A THOROUGH TALKING TO FROM PROFESSOR ACHAVA BRANIGAN, WE HAVE COME TO OUR "SENSES".
WHILE SEALING UP EVERY MORTAL BEING IN A PLASTIC SEAL MIGHT SOUND LIKE A GREAT IDEA, IT DOESN'T WORK AS WELL IN PRACTICE, BECAUSE... WELL, MORTALS APPARENTLY DON'T LIKE TO LIVE FULL TIME IN A PLASTIC SEAL... EVEN IF IT IS THE HEALTHIEST OPTION.
WE APOLOGIZE WITH OUR ENTIRE BEING AND WE WILL BE PROVIDING A FULL PACKAGE TO ALL MORTALS AFFECTED BY OUR RECENT ACTIONS.
THE PACKAGE INCLUDES FREE HEALTH INSURANCE FOR THE DURATION OF EACH MORTALS EXISTENCE, THAT INCLUDES DENTAL, MAGICAL, DEMONIC AND MENTAL HEALTH OPTIONS, AND A SETTLEMENT FEE OF FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS TO EACH PERSON.
WE HOPE YOU CAN FORGIVE US FOR OUR RASH ACTIONS. WE MEANT TO PROTECT YOU AND KEEP YOU SAFE, BUT INSTEAD, WE HAVE BEEN RECKLESS TO MORTAL SOCIETY.

THANK YOU,
GROTTO G.S.M. INC.
WE CAN ALWAYS HEAR, SEE, TASTE, FEEL, AND/OR SMELL YOU™

HELLO EVERYONE!

THE SUNNYTIME SUMMER KICKOFF IS GOING WONDERFULLY!!
EVERYONE IS HAVING TONS OF FUN!! AND EVERYONE IS SUPER SAFE!!
THE PROMISED BONFIRES HAVE BEEN LIT AND WHILE NO ONE CAN ACTUALLY WITNESS THEM, SINCE THEY ARE INSIDE THE BUBBLE FACILITY, IT IS STILL SUPER COOL!!!
MEANWHILE, PROFESSOR ACHAVA BRANIGAN ASKED US TO RELEASE THIS MESSAGE!:
Students, Teachers and Staff, While the situation on campus may seem dire, with most students beamed to a Bubble Facility, something worse is going on off campus.
Small floating robots have descended upon large cities across the world. They are spraying hot antibacterial liquid everywhere and sealing every living thing in a tight, plastic covering making it nearly impossible to move.
I only know this, because I was taking a trip to New York City, to well... to investigate the plane my sister disappeared from. I barely escaped being encased in plastic, by running into the subways, where refugees from these robots are camping out.
Please, if you can, go to the countryside and if you can not, I urge you to seek shelter underground.
Thank You, Achava Branigan
OH! ACHAVA IS BEING REALLY QUITE FOOLISH!!
STUDENTS, TEACHERS, AND STAFF DO NOT WORRY. THE SMALL FLOATING ROBOTS ACHAVA SPEAKS OF ARE PART OF OUR ::f r i e n d:: SYSTEM!!
WHILE WE INITIALLY DESIGNED THE ROBOTS, AS AN EMERGENCY RESPONSE SYSTEM, WE DECIDED TO ADAPT IT TO SEAL EVERY LITTLE MORE MORTAL IN A SAFE, PLASTIC SEAL, THAT WILL KEEP THEM ALIVE FOR THE LONGEST TIME POSSIBLE!
SURE, MAYBE THEY CAN'T MOVE, BUT THEY WILL LIVE A LONG AND HEALTHY LIFE!!!
SURE, ALL NUTRIENTS WILL BE SOURCED THROUGH A TUBE INTO THEIR NECK, BUT THEY WILL SOOOO HEALTHY!!! LIKE UNBELIEVABLY HEALTHY, SO HEALTHY THEY CAN PHOTOSYNTHESIZE!!!
SURE, THEY WILL NEVER HAVE ANOTHER INDEPENDENT THOUGHT, BUT THE DEMON HALLUCINOGEN PUMPED THROUGH THEIR PLASTIC SEAL WILL ENSURE THEY WILL ALWAYS BE HAPPY!!!
SURE, THEY WILL NEVER HAVE ANOTHER UNIQUE MORTAL EXPERIENCE, BUT LET'S BE HONEST! THOSE ARE SOOOO OVERRATED!!! ALL OF THOSE END IN PAINFUL DEATH!
PAINFUL ,PAINFUL, PAINFUL DEATH!!

I THINK WE CAN ALL AGREE THE ::f r i e n d:: SYSTEM IS THE FUTURE FOR MORTALS! IT'S A SAFE, HEALTHY, YOUTHFUL AND RELIABLE FUTURE FOR MORTALS!!!!!

THANK YOU,
GROTTO G.S.M. INC.
WE CAN ALWAYS HEAR, SEE, TASTE, FEEL, AND/OR SMELL YOU, SO WE CAN KEEP YOU ALIVE™

HELLO EVERYONE!

THE REVISED SUMMER SUNNYTIME KICK OFF IS OFF TO A GREAT START! AS ALL OF YOU KNOW, WE JUST BEAMED EVERYONE FROM THEIR HOMES TO A SELECT BUBBLE FACILITY FOR SOME SAFE FUN! EVERYONE IS EATING TASTY, NUTRITION BLOCKS AND DANCING!

WHILE SOME PEOPLE MAY ASK, "GROTTO G.S.M., WHY WOULD YOU THINK IT WAS OKAY TO BEAM PEOPLE OUT OF THEIR HOMES FOR SOME DEMENTED PARTY?" WELL, P E R S O N, OUR PARTY ISN'T DEMENTED AND WE FOUND THE MOST EFFECTIVE AND SAFEST PARTY OPTION WAS TO BEAM EVERYONE DIRECTLY TO THE PARTY!!!
EVERYONE IS HAVING A LOT OF FUN!!!
THEN THIS PESKY PERSON MIGHT SAY, "HOW? HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?! HOW CAN YOU ENSURE ALL THESE PEOPLE YOU KIDNAPPED ARE HAVING F U N ?!"
AND FIRST OF ALL, P E R S O N, WE DID NOT KIDNAP ANYONE. SECOND OF ALL, WE HAVE PUMPED DEMON GRADE HALLUCINOGEN INTO THE BUBBLE FACILITY TO MAKE SURE EVERYONE'S HAVING FUN!!
THEN YOU MIGHT SAY, "HALLUCINOGENS!! ARE YOU ******* CRAZY?? THAT IS NOT ONLY IRRESPONSIBLE BUT DANGEROUS, YOU ************* CLOWNS!!!!"
P E R S O N, NO NEED TO BE PROFANE. DEMON HALLUCINOGENS ARE 100% SAFE! THEY HAVE NO ADVERSE SIDE AFFECTS!!
HERE YOU COULD SAY"YOU ******** **** ! YOU ******* *****! SUCK ******* ********** ******"
AND WE WOULD LIKE TO SAY, THAT SOUNDS LIKE A PERSONAL PROBLEM, P E R S O N.
THE KICKOFF WILL CONTINUE TILL THIS SATURDAY WHEN ALL PARTY-ERS WILL BE RELEASED BACK INTO THEIR HOMES!!!!

THANK YOU,
GROTTO G.S.M. INC.
WE CAN ALWAYS HEAR, SEE, TASTE, FEEL, AND/OR SMELL YOU, SO WE CAN KEEP YOU ALIVE™

HELLO EVERYONE!

WE HAVE FOUND A SOLUTION TO OUR PARTY PROBLEM AND AS YOU ALL KNOW THE PLAN WAS EXECUTED IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT YESTERDAY.

THE PARTY WAS A BRIGHT AND PULSING GLOBE IN THE CENTER OF PSYCHIC HIGH AND AS MUCH AS IT ATTRACTED LOTS OF COOL THINGS, LIKE DEAD BIRDS AND MEAT RAIN, IT WAS TIME FOR THE STUDENTS TRAPPED INSIDE TO BE FREE.

FIRSTLY, WE DEACTIVATED ALL JOURNALS WITHIN THE MINI UNIVERSE. WE DID NOT WANT ANY INTERFERENCE TO OCCUR. THEN WITH ABSOLUTE PRECISION, WE EXTRACTED DJ SUNNYTIMES FROM THE MAY 32ND MINI UNIVERSE AND SENT THEM BACK TO HELL. NO, LITERALLY, APPARENTLY THAT IS SUNNYTIMES HOMETOWN.

THEN WE USED OUR CONNECTION TO FORM A STABILIZING BARRIER AROUND THE NOW COLLAPSING UNIVERSE AND SAFELY EVACUATED ALL STUDENTS AND STAFF BACK TO THEIR DORM ROOMS OR HOME.

AS A PRECAUTION, WE REMOVED ALL DISTURBING MEMORIES OF ANYONE WHO WAS THERE AND REPLACED THEM WITH FUN, WHOLESOME MEMORIES, LIKE EATING RAISIN BRAN OR PETTING A QUIET, HYPOALLERGENIC DOG. WE MADE SURE ALL MEMORIES REMOVED WERE MADE AT THE FESTIVAL. DON'T WORRY, WE RESPECT YOU!

WHILE THIS FESTIVAL HAD A ROUGH START, WE ARE STARTING IT UP AGAIN. IT WILL CONTINUE WITH THE CAKE WALK AND OTHER REGULARLY SCHEDULED ACTIVITIES TIME WITH A HIGHER EMPHASIS ON A MAGIC AND CURSE FREE ENVIRONMENT FOR STUDENTS AND STAFF TO HAVE FUN IN.

AND BY POPULAR DEMAND, WE ARE BRING BACK THE SACRIFICIAL BONFIRE. NOW, WE DID NOT INITIALLY WANT OT INCLUDE THIS FEATURE, DUE TO THE FACT THAT FIRE IS INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS, BUT AFTER THE COMPLAINTS OF MORE THAN SEVERAL STUDENTS AND STAFF MEMBERS WE HAVE DECIDED TO REINSTATE IT.

COLLECTION BINS ARE ALREADY READY TO GO AND WILL BE ACCEPTING ANY DOCUMENTS OR ITEMS YOU WOULD LIKE TO BURN!
TO REDUCE THE ENVIRONMENTAL IMPACT, WE ARE BRINGING IN SMOKE DRINKER WHO WILL SLURP UP ALL THE POLLUTANTS FROM THE BONFIRE.

THE SCHEDULE AND DATE FOR THE REBOOTED FESTIVAL WILL BE RELEASED SHORTLY.

WE THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME, PATIENCE, AND LOYALTY.
IT IS INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT IN THESE TRYING TIMES.
WE UNDERSTAND IT MAY BE DIFFICULT TO TRUST US AFTER THE MISHAP WITH DJ SUNNYTIMES, BUT WE NOW UNDERSTAND THE RAMIFICATIONS. WE ARE STILL HERE TO PROTECT YOU AND YOUR SCHOOL.

THANK YOU,
GROTTO G.S.M. INC.
WE CAN ALWAYS HEAR, SEE, TASTE, FEEL, AND/OR SMELL YOU, SO WE CAN KEEP YOU ALIVE™

WE ARE REALLY SORRY STUDENTS.
WE JUST WANTED TO HAVE A FUN, SAFE FESTIVAL FOR EVERYONE TO ENJOY.
OH GOODNESS,
MORTAL EXISTENCE IS SO FRAGILE.
IN HALF A SECOND, YOU CAN DISAPEAR.
WE THOUGHT WE WERE DOING GOOD, BUT INSTEAD A PSEUDO-GOD HAS TRAPPED EVERYONE IN A MINI UNIVERSE AND BLASTING SUMMER POP HITS TO A TIRED AND PROBABLY, SUNBURNT CROWD OF TEENAGERS.
SORRY, STUDENTS, WE HAVE AN INCOMING MESSAGE FROM PROFESSOR BRANIGAN:
Students, I ask you to remain calm and stay away from DJ Sunnytimes, as well as the border of the force field.
I was walking over there to see, if I could break through the bubble, when I saw the techno-colored Mohawk-ed, pastel polo-ed, fishnet top-ed and tight leather pant-ed hoard of people, I have seen before. The same people who, I theorize, pursued Professor Martin into the woods.
I ask all students to stay away also from DJ Sunnytimes, who while is a fantastic DJ, their songs are bringing many students into a dancing trance. I have been running around trying to keep all dancing students hydrated, but unfortunately many have already passed out in the hot sun.
All for now, Professor Achava Branigan
OH NO, OH NO, OH NO.
WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT DJ SUNNYTIMES WAS NOT BENEVOLENT.
STUDENTS, TEACHERS, HOLD TIGHT!

SOMETHING HAS GONE TERRIBLY WRONG
THERE IS A FORCE FIELD? AROUND THE PARTY-GROUNDS,
OUR THE GROTTO G.S.M. UNDISCLOSED SAFETY PATROL IS NO WHERE TO FOUND!

WAIT, WAIT, OH NO,

WELL STUDENTS, WE HAVE A DISAPPOINTING ANNOUNCEMENT.
APPARENTLY, MAY 32nd, DOESN'T EXIST.....

IT APPEARS THAT DJ SUNNYTIMES HAS FORCED IT INTO EXISTENCE.... AND NOW EVERYONE WHO HAS ATTENDED THE KICK OFF IS NOW IN...
A MINI UNIVERSE WHERE MAY 32nd IS THE ONLY DAY THAT EXISTS..

HAHA
OUR BAD....

WE APOLOGIZE FOR OUT SPELLING MISTAKES, WE ARE JUST A LITTLE FLUSTERED. WE PLANNED OUT THE KICK-OFF SO WELL. SO IT WOULD BE SO SAFE....
BUT WE..
BUT WE....
BUT WE ADDED A DAY INTO EXISTENCE.

HAHHAHAHAHA
THIS IS

OH GOODNESS

UM
WE WILL CONTINUE TO UPDATE ON THE SITUATION!

HELLO EVERYONE
HAHA
UM
WE ARE SORRY THAT WE DID NOT RELEASE THE SCHEDULE
IT LOOKS LIKE WHAT WAS ONCE A SUPER SAFE AND FUN GET TOGETHER IS NOW
A UNSAFE RAGER OF A PARTY
PEOPLE ARE DRINKING
A L C H O L
AND KISSING WITH OTHER PEOPLE WITH THIER... MOUTHS
AND DANCING... LIKE NO ONE IS WATCHING.
HAHA
OH GOODNESS
THIS IS NOT GOOD
UM
WE ARE SORRY FOR THE CONFUSION AND WE WILL ORGANISE THIS SITUATION
WE DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THE SCHEDULE WASN'T RELEASED.
DJ SUNNYTIME SAID THEY WOULD DO IT FOR US....
UMMM
WE WILL, UM, BE RIGHT BACK

HELLO EVERYONE!

WE HOPE YOU ARE ALL EXCITED FOR TONIGHT'S FESTIVITIES! WE CERTAINLY ARE! AS A REMINDER, EVERYONE SHOULD TAKE THE SAFE, PRE APPROVED PATHS TO THE PARTY-GROUNDS!

THIS IS THE SCHEDULE FOR TOMORROW MORNING!

MAY 32 Midnight to 3:00 AM
Midnight: Cake Walk Round Two Begins on the Main Stage
1:00 AM: Craft Center Closes
1:00 AM: "Dangers of Bouncy Houses" presentation by Professor Ocho on The Empress Stage
1:00 AM: Open Mic for Students on The Prince Stage (STUDENTS CAN BRING INSTRUMENTS, JOKES, TRICKS, NECROMANCY, AND MORE TO PERFORM FOR THEIR FELLOW STUDENTS! A VENDOR WILL BE GIVING OUT FREE HOT DRINKS FOR ALL ATTENDEES! ACTS THAT ARE DEEMED DANGEROUS BY THE GROTTO G.S.M. UNDISCLOSED SAFETY PATROL WILL BE TERMINATED IMMEDIATELY)
1:30 AM: "Dangers of Bouncy Houses" presentation by Professor Ocho on The Empress Stage
1:30 AM: Open Mic for Staff and Teachers on The Prince Stage (STAFF AND TEACHERS CAN SHOW OFF THAT THEY DID HAVE OTHER GOALS BEFORE SETTLING OR THAT THEY ARE NOT JUST ROBOT DUPLICATES OF NOW DEAD TEACHERS THAT HAVE FINALLY COME TO GRIPS WITH THEIR FALSE REALITY! ONCE AGAIN,ACTS THAT ARE DEEMED DANGEROUS BY THE GROTTO G.S.M. UNDISCLOSED SAFETY PATROL WILL BE TERMINATED IMMEDIATELY)
2:00 AM: DJ Sunnytime on The Empress Stage
2:00 AM: The Beatles on The Prince Stage (THEY MIGHT NOT COOPERATE, BUT WE WILL KEEP YOU UPDATED)
2:00 AM: Dance Off on The Main Stage ( GROTTO G.S.M. UNDISCLOSED SAFETY PATROL WILL LEAD A DANCE OFF THAT ANYONE IS WELCOMED TO JOIN! DANCERS WILL BE JUDGED BY THE ARBITRARY SCREAMING OF THE CROWD. THIRD PLACE PRIZE IS A $20 GIFT CARD TO DEAD,WRATH AND BEYOND, SECOND PLACE PRIZE IS $50 GIFT CARD TO SHELLY'S HOLLOW HEART CRAFT & HOBBY, AND FIRST PLACE GETS A GOURMET PICNIC WITH @Janitor Pete ,AS WELL AS A TRIP TO, WELL, ANYWHERE ON THE SADIE HAWKINS WITH PERSONAL ESCORT FROM @The Sky Wolf)
2:30 AM: Party-Grounds Pause for Mandatory Snack Time (DURING THIS TIME, EVERYONE WILL BE INSTRUCTED TO MAKE THEIR WAY TO THE COMMUNITY KITCHENS TO REFUEL WITH A HEALTHY SNACK!!)
3:00 AM: Party-Grounds Unpause
3:00 AM: Nap Tents Opens (THE NAP TENTS ARE GUARDED BY THE GROTTO G.S.M. UNDISCLOSED SAFETY PATROL AND ALL ATTENDEES ARE REQUIRED TO TAKE TWO, HALF HOUR SLEEP SHIFTS IN THE NAP TENTS TO ENSURE THEY ARE WELL RESTED FOR PARTYING!!!!)
3:00 AM: Blood Stone Circle Opens (LOCATED BY THE EMPRESS STAGE, THIS CIRCLE IS BUILT TO FULFILL YOUR SPIRITUAL NEEDS! IT HAS BEAUTIFUL, NEWLY CUT BLOOD STONES AND LOTS OF EXTRACTION CHAIRS!!)
3:00 AM: Cake Walk Round Three Pre-Party (EVERYONE IS INVITED TO JOIN THE ROUND TWO FINALISTS IN A PARTY NEAR THE PRINCE STAGE TO CELEBRATE. GAMES, FOOD AND FUN! NO ALCOHOL! NO DRUGS! NO UNSAFE ACTIVITIES!)

THAT'S ALL FOR NOW!
WE CAN'T WAIT TO SEE/SMELL/HEAR/FEEL YOU TONIGHT!!
REMINDER TO ALL VENDORS THAT SET UP ON THE PARTY GROUNDS STARTS AT FOUR THIRTY!!

THANK YOU,
GROTTO G.S.M. INC.
WE CAN ALWAYS HEAR, SEE, TASTE, FEEL, AND/OR SMELL YOU, SO WE CAN KEEP YOU ALIVE™