@XxFireQueenxX hi and uhhh welcome to psyhigh! at the moment people in the club are busy, but um i could try and teach you about the crafts and such

Hey,I'm kinda confused right now,can someone tutor me?

oh gosh um @timberlina im so sorry uh i didnt mean to go into your treehouse, i just uh get lost awfully easily and im still trying to um find my way around umm

Had some unexpected visitors today from the Psychic Crime Club. Seems there was a bit of confusion about where their meeting was being held.

I guess my treehouse has gained some notoriety, but it's my own private dwelling, not a public meeting place. It's the treeFORT they were looking for, which is that ramshackle one-room playhouse thing on lower campus.

I'm always happy to take a visitor and sit a spell, so I'm not trying to be unneighborly. Just tryin' to save you a trip if you're looking for a club meeting. Also, it's still a bit touch-and-go with the owls here in this neck of the woods, so if you're on the trails it's a good idea to puff out your chest and make a lot of noise so they don't try and adopt you and take you up to their nests.

@Meat Mathieson umm, i think those are some pretty good ideas! uh, i also would suggest for all the restrooms that we uh, flip the toilet paper so the little flappy toilet paper faces the wall, but um, i think that ill be able to find it

I accept the temporary appointment as interim president of Psychic Crime Club, @Nobody, though I prefer the title "President Tartare."

During my tenure, I believe we should concentrate on attainable, fundamental crimes. I would like these to be the psychic crime priorities for the next month:

1. Lying. But only subjective lies, like answers to "does this make my butt look big?" and "do you like my new haircut?"

2. Under-tipping. If called for by poor service.

3. Including white paper towels in the composting.

4. Not calling you mother every day. Shoot for every other day.

With this criminal activity as a foundation, I believe we will have a good base going forward for bigger crimes.

For now, let's meet in the treefort. There is a slot on Thursday afternoons we can have. I'm still having trouble finding my way into the new lab, @patrick, but hopefully @xiirth will be able to locate the treefort.

hey um hello uh i saw that you guys needed an idea um i dont have one but i would like to join? if thats alright um i have lots of sprinkles for you @Nobody i do like crime awfully a lot so uh i might be handy cuz i can uh be in multiple places in once? um thank you uh

When they said that "crime does not pay" (at the career counseling center) I didn't think they actually meant it literally. But now we're 0 for 2 as a crime club. We really need a win, @Nobody. Maybe something easier? Like "candy from a baby" easy?

Dear Somebody,
Things did not go at all as planned. Even after we decided on a single plan and the time and date (earlier today).

@Monterey Jack and a few others had pointed out that I kept changing tactics and stating different times and dates for the heist, so at some point someone conjured a boulder and we engraved the information in stone to prevent confusion. Some harsh words were exchanged, though. I know I can be slightly forgetful, but there was no need to call me "flighty" or an "amnesiac". In fact, I... Uh... I....umm....uhh...In fact, ummmmm.... Uhh... What was I saying?

Anyway, @Monterey Jack, @Steak Richardson, and the perpetually befuddled @Kip Gilly were supposed to go undercover and distract the guards while @patrick, @Isabella Irish, and I extracted the manuscript, and @nightwolf, Sterling (the Weather Mage), and Oengus (a bagpipe player) stood watch outside the museum in case anything went wrong.

Things went wrong.

We weren't the only ones who had heard about the priceless manuscript; by the time we got there, it had already been stolen, and Psy Corps was there, along with someone who looked vaguely like @Junior Agent LuLu. Or maybe my Great Aunt Mathilda. But as I was saying, we were almost caught and had to make an escape; but not before we found out who had beaten us to the heist. It was Satanic High School's Evil Society for The Criminally Inclined (ESTCI). And not only that, but the contact who had promised us 500,000 jars of sprinkles and two tons of diamonds bought the manuscript from ESTCI for 650,000 cans of lime juice and three tons of diamonds. Who even drinks lime juice?

They may have won this time, but next time it won't be so easy. I think. At least, that's what I was told to say.

In other unrelated news, Psychic Crime Club's next meeting will be in the vineyard at three pm on Monday. I think. We will discuss a new heist and evasive maneuvers. And possibly something else.

Farewell for now,
Nobody

I'm not sure how much more time I can spend in the broiler room for Crime Club meetings. @Nobody? Could we meet somewhere different tonight?

We were in there for so long last night for the planning meeting, it really started to take a toll on my muscle tissue. Not having any skin I have to be extra careful not to get cooked. I tried to sit as far away from the flame as I could, but my instant-read thermometer was getting into the red.

We know @Monterey Jack likes to attend nude (since suits were made optional), but I'm going to need to come dressed in aluminum foil and bring a baster if we're in there for another two hours. Or five. Time gets so erratic with @patrick around, even hiding out in his pocket dimension.