PSYHIGH'S BLIGHTED SOIL
by Amber Morgan, Psycho-environmental Reporter, Psytimes

“You wouldn’t believe what goes into this soil,” Gardener Jo tells me, standing at the compost staging bins at the edge of the woods behind the gym. Gardener Jo has been head psychic gardener for just a few months, but has spent years doing field work and research on the subject.

“When these gardens were originally constructed, over two centuries ago, the fertilizer was almost entirely made from the blood of indigenous people,” Jo says. “It was cheap, plentiful, and the school was connected to the psychic power infrastructure in such a way that they had plenty of access. It still forms the foundation of what everything’s built on.”

As we talk, trucks unload fresh soil and compost into the bins behind us. The smell is intensely fecund. It causes a strange feeling to well up in me, like I am about to laugh or cry hysterically.

"Sure, it’s horrible. Beyond comprehension, really. But these gardens are built on it," Jo tells me.

Surely it's a different story today?

"We try to keep negative aspects out of the supply chain, but it’s really not possible. Wage slavery, actual slavery, ecological destruction, war. It all goes into what the garden is designed to use." Jo says. "It's really a conundrum."

Gardener Jo takes a whiff of the air coming from the steaming piles in the bins.

"Unfortunately it's been getting a lot richer lately," Gardener Jo says. "But the garden looks great, doesn't it?"

Hello! While I'm stuck at the bottom of this well, I've noticed something. You know the three keys to our schools whole like spirit program or whatever? Y'know, like Scientia, Occultus (my personal favorite), and Spiritus (my personal least favorite)? I figured out something, take the first letter to each of the keys and it spells out SOS!!!!

Who do I even reach out to about this? Considering its our school this definitely goes deeper than just a coincidence. The only staff member I really see active on the forum is @Ms. Hazeltine but she is just the Student Events Cooardinator or whatever so I doubt she knows.

Anyone have ideas? Also, I may write a peice on Occultus because I really align with it!

Hello! I just joined the school from Napoli, Italy. I am what is called a "catboy" and I specialize in fabrication and genorating paradox's. I am 16 and my birthday is 20/2! I do not have a mother or father, I actually remember being born. A kitten ate a slice of pizza, then coughed up a hairball, that hairball turned into me! To be clear, I am not like a minotaur, I am just a boy with cat ears and a cat tail, also very easily suceptable to cat-nip. I hope we can be friends!

- Angelo Di Gattino :3

I was walking through the clover forest when I found a little well! I hear that here if you flip a coin into the well you get good luck. I took a 1 yen coin out and flung it down when I heard a mewl. A big Maine Coon cat was meowing down there and I accidentally hit it with my coin. I saw it needed help and I lowered the bucket to scoop it up. It was suprising smart as it hopped in and let me lift it up. I am not very strong but I slowly lifted it.

When it came up it hopped out and turned into a pretty human boy. I was surprised but I had to remind myself that transformation was normal here as this is the Psychic High School. I myself applied for Transformation 101 next semester with Mx.Shift.

"Thank you so much. I thought I would never get out."

I nodded. His eyes were a pretty but dark shade of brown and his glasses did not hide that.

"Oh-- uh, I don't think I've seen you around. I am @Scaramouche Vatimoses, you can call me Scott. Who are you? Are you new? Oh! You're a catboy! That's funny because I was just a cat! Uh... but what is your name?"

He sure did talk a lot. I did not mind, I could tell he was also Italian with his accent.

"I Angelo Di Gattino. I just came here. I from Napoli, Italy. You?"

I did not feel confident in myself when I spoke, he is the first person here I've spoken to yet but I tried my hardest.

"Ah! I am from Napoli too! My father is Dionysus, you heard of him? Probably, he is a god. He's really cool! Who are your parents?"

My brain cried as it tried to process the English.

"Eh... my parents? Yeah em... Cat and eh... Pizza."

He did not seem phazed.

"That not is... eh... unnormal?"

"Nope! We have all sorts of people here! You fit in! Where's your favorite dimension-- oo-- have you even been out of the dimension!? I'll have to take you, how about.... tonight! Meet at my dorm, I think you're in the one next to me!"

I nodded and blinked, next thing I know he was scampered away.

Aww gee! Thanks, @Angelo Di Gattino! You can call me Scott for short by the way! I don't know if you know everyone can see your comments on my looks but I do appreciate it! I will say, you are quite pretty yourself!

Anyways, can't wait to see you tonight! We will have soo much fun! I am a master at portal magic so you will not be dissapointed. Just as a reminder, my dorm number is ∅♡

My ditch witch has her eyes on that well in the clover forest, @Angelo Di Gattino. We're plumbing it! Going to set up drip lines all along the gardens and maybe these flowers will quit chompin' at our boots. And keep critters from splashing in.

I figured it was time to bring the water to the land, so I got a part-time job with the Ditch Witch and she had me carry buckets. Endless Limons marching back and forth from the little well in the Clover Forest to the Garden of Live Flowers.

“Hey Limon isn’t that your shoe stuck in the mud by the daffodils?”

That’s an excellent question and I’m glad you asked. Yes it is, and my ankle has been seen to and bandaged by school nurse Ms. Doom, who really knows her bandages, since she’s a mummy.

The Ditch Witch says yeah that’s why she said to wear the Kevlar waders when you are watering the hungry flowers.

I got shanghaied by the Compost Mafia. With their so-called secret airstrip out beyond the soccer field. They put a sack over my head and threw me into a plane and I woke up at an airbase in the jungle, where I was put on a team digging out a sacred burial ground. We filled containers and loaded them on the plane and came back. Tomorrow we put the soil on the roses.

A NEW BLOOM FOR BLIGHTED SOIL?
by Amber Morgan, Psycho-environmental Reporter, Psytimes

Psyhigh's Scientia department has a green thumb.

"Well I wouldn't exactly call it green," says senior Trix Cadavre. "There's a lot of inorganic and synthetic compounds in it, but I guess you could call it 'life.'"

The Scientia department thinks it's a winner, and is funding a large scale experiment based on Trix's work in the gardens of Lower Campus.

"As we've learned," Trix says, "the soil beneath Psyhigh is pretty toxic. It got that way through over two centuries of exploitation, destruction, and genocide. And it's making the flowers nasty. But those toxins can be cleaned from the soil. Removed entirely. As if it all had never happened."

Trix has invented a new life form that feeds on the death and destruction of history, transforms it, and passes it back into the soil as nutritious waste. It looks like a big silver slug. About the size of a grapefruit.

"Even if the school continues to use blighted soil, imported from lands where the ground is still fresh with child slavery and ecological devastation, my Squirms can still clean it up, and create nutritious smelling waste to feed the flowers in our garden," Trix adds. "This way we can just forget about all that stuff that happened, or is still happening, in the world."

The Scientia department will be releasing 40 dozen Squirms in the gardens of Lower Campus this week.

Happy Flower Moon everybody!