Thought Roundup

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V the poet
- 2/26/2024 4:22pm

I keep thinking about leaving my room to talk to others. It's not like anybody would know who I am.

Imagine this:

"Hey, haven't seen you 'round these parts? What's your name, fella?"

"I'm V the poet!"

"What?? Two hornlops of a Devils yolfin' yer V the poet!"

I mean, I think that's how people talk. I haven't talked to one in months.

So, yeah, could you help me out?

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- 1/30/2024 11:48pm

my wild thought has become quite tame. all it needed was a little care and affection.

and food. lots of food.

it's eaten up all my roommate's food for thought, and now everyone at my lunch table has run dry. but this wild thought keeps getting bigger and hungrier.

we may have to go hunting.

Ernestine Picklefish
- 1/21/2024 11:17pm

I used to feed the feral thoughts that live by the rail road tracks behind the grocery store. I was part of a group. We would catch them and have them fixed so they couldn't breed and let them loose again. I think it's kinder than having them destroyed.

- 1/17/2024 9:52pm

As a member of the secondhand thought economy, I have a lucrative side hustle gleaning unused and forgotten thoughts and turning them into cold hard virtual psybercoin/z boyeeeeee!

I'm able to gather a steady harvest of such surplus thoughts right here in my dorm, picking up with the other kids leave behind.

But now the school is paying some washed up lowlife Thought Wrangler to come in and take them away? I wuz doin that for free, and now you're taking those sweet sweet psybercoin/z right out of daddy's mouth.

- 1/14/2024 9:52pm

As a thought owner, I often feel like just giving up! It's never clear who's in charge, who's leading things around here. They never do what you tell them, won't come when they're called. They'll still come up and snuggle when they want to, but it's always on their terms.

Which is why I've thought about turning my own thoughts in to the shelter or turning them loose and getting a whole new set.

The best situation would be to get ones that were already trained. By a professional.

Some people think it's cruel to turn your back on your own thoughts and get all pre-trained new ones, but it would be so much easier if I didn't have to think them for myself.

- 1/11/2024 10:35pm

yes milt i would like to report an intrusion error, near the blacktop, late at night.

multimodal analysis suggested it was frightened. and hungry. with glowing red eyes and fur standing on end.

i took it home and fed it and now i am going to keep it.

Milt Wilkerson
- 1/7/2024 9:40pm

We've had a request for "more transparency" about our work rounding up the wild and stray thoughts around campus and it's clear the student body lacks a clear understanding of what this kind of work entails.

1. If your thoughts are chipped, and have merely become lost or confused, they can be claimed at Stray Thought Shelter during business hours on business days.

2. Uncontrollable thoughts will be removed from campus, chipped or not.

3. Thought traps have been placed around campus, easily identifiable by the hot pink tape (which is a color that thoughts are unable to see). Tampering with thought traps is prohibited.

Just follow these easy protocols and we know you'll find a much clearer and easy to understand campus quite soon.

Milt Wilkerson
Thought Wrangler

Uzboy Chan
- 1/2/2024 9:49pm

I have felt the presence of strange thoughts at the tetherball court late at night... lurking in the shadows. Disturbing thoughts.

I've got my front thoughts all teamed up, working on my focus oh the ball... muscle memory pulling through to deliver just right hit... but beyond all that, there's something in the background... something in the darkness... I can't quite make it out, but if I try to look directly at it, I loose my focus on the tetherball, so I CAN'T look away...

Can you help me, @Milt Wilkerson?

- 12/31/2023 5:07pm

Yeah my thoughts have been running away and getting lost more than ever, @Milt Wilkerson. What happens if you catch them? Can I get them back? I am sure they are all microchipped.

Milt Wilkerson
- 12/30/2023 8:41pm

Thoughts at Psychic High School have been getting a little out of control, so that's why they called me in:

Milt Wilkerson: Thought Wrangler

You've got your Stray Thoughts. They're a handful. And the Intrusive Thoughts -- they can be a bear, let me tell you! And in general a lot of Dysregulated Thoughts. So I've been hired by the school (you can check my credentials with @Ms. Hazeltine if you like) to clean things up.

I'll be working the campus grounds over the next month, including many public areas like your cafeteria, library, gym, and of course the dorms. If you see the hot pink THOUGHT ROUNDUP tape, please give our specialists ample room.

You may find this process disruptive. Thanks for your understanding.

Milt Wilkerson
Thought Wrangler