If folks are worried about getting trampled at the frog riding exhibition, the Psychic Groundskeeping Crew will have the arena reconstructed soon. And the grandstands will be significantly reinforced. We sure didn’t imagine frogs jumping like that, I’ll tell you.
Big Molly was the main culprit. She’d been riling up the other frogs all week, with her inflammatory talk of the “lost empire” and the “jade age.” These giant garden frogs will believe anything they hear. And then croak about it all night!
We are supervising their re-indoctrination at this time. @dirtpicnic
has learned their language pretty good, and has volunteered to take the new message to the frogs tonight, at their croaking frog council. There will be a singing of the stories, and @dirtpicnic
will relate the tales of the trail and the sagebrush, the swamp and the pond, the bridle and the bit.
We’ll get these froggies back in line in no time, just you wait!
I’ve spent a fair amount of time sizing up these slippery varmints, and I must say I’m intrigued about the possibility of riding a few.
Contrary to what you may have heard, Frog and Toad are not always friends. They generally prefer to keep out of each other’s business. And when you work closely with either them, it’s clear how different they are.
For instance, while you can ride a toad without a saddle, the back of a frog is virtually friction free. So I will insist on a small saddle, a cinch, and a rein.
Honestly, I find that smooth frog skin a bit disconcerting. That and the way they look at you with them big bulgy eyes. The toads back home are good natured critters, and ain't so alien as these. I do miss the toads back home, croaking as the sun sets over the crick, nuzzling up against my arm with their big flat snouts, eating apples and sugar cubes right out of my hand.
Also, both for my own safety and that of the crowd, I'll need a frog-fightin' rodeo clown, so as to keep the slippery devil in check if he gets away from me. @dirtpicnic
has kindly volunteered for that role, as they believe it may help them in their ascension.
So, giddy up all you amphibian rodeo fans! A few more nights of practice on the mechanical frog in the gym and we'll be having ourselves a real frog roundup on lower campus. And I hope to see you there!
People often stop and ask me about my spurs. And when I tell them they are Toad Spurs they say I oughta go down to the reflecting pool and take a bareback ride on one of them untamed giant frogs.
Don't you people know the difference between giant frogs and giant toads?! What kind of education does this school provide anyway?