Yeah I have experienced this too. There's a snack machine outside the cafeteria that works for everybody except me. It just eats my money and then acts smug. Is this something you could help with @Guy Jester? Are you an sentient machine whisperer? Because it owes me like nine dollars.

Now the snack machine is calling me really derogatory names when I walk by, and sayin stuff like "Hey kid, why don't you put another $5 in me? Hyuk hyuk hyuk!"

@Guy Jester I thought you were going to have a talk with that vending machine? Because if you did then it didn't help! And the machines next to it are getting sucked in by peer pressure and going along with the mean one and laughing at its jokes. It's only a matter of time until they start eating money (or fingers) too...

Help us @Guy Jester. You're our only hope!

Tonight I tried cutting through school from the pool to the cafeteria - but THEY cut me off. The evil vending machines! I barely made it out in one piece!

The fluorescent hall lights were half off (where are the light switches anyway? why don't trust us with light switches?), and I tried being really sneaky, but just as I turned the corner, BAM there they were. At first they surrounded me, then started chest bumping me with their front panels and snapping at me with their flappy take-out ports.

But then the main one - the one who was the first one to steal my money and start bullying me - it was getting cocky, and strutted out in front of the others to get right in my face, kind of rocking from side to side to move around, but leaned too far to one side and fell over with a big crash. That's when I took off.

I'm not cutting through the building at night again, that's for sure.

And I haven't seen @Guy Jester for days. Last I heard he was going go talk with those machines but... what if they ate him? What if he's trapped inside one of them right now, surviving on only Funyuns and Milky Way bars? And if he didn't have any luck, who else can stand up against these monsters?

Somebody needs to get those bully vending machines in line. They behave well enough if there's a lot of people around, but they're still sneering at me and muttering under their breath. Could you get a chance to try your machine-whisperer magic on them @Guy Jester? I've emailed the admin staff but they just ignore me. I've heard it has something to do with the Vending Machine Union so they're afraid to do anything. But maybe you can talk to them, Guy?

The vending machines are stalking me now. I see them around every corner, in the buildings and in my dorm and even down in the gardens. They haven't tried anything lately but I can tell they're planning something. When you walk by them they stand perfectly still, but as soon as you turn your back you can hear them banging and clomping off to hide somewhere else.

Somebody needs to stand up to them, @patrick. So if you've got a plan, I'm willing to be the bait.