So, about that whole “people getting their organs harvested and/or turning into grotesque centipede monsters” thing...
I swear I’m not a bad guy! Really! I’ve gotta make money somehow, and I don’t get financial aid anymore since Practical Alchemy is kicking my ass. I’m up to my horns in student loan debt, and I can’t keep relying on my father when the going gets tough. If I can’t fix my grades, I’ve gotta figure out how to survive without any support from the school.
I’m sure you guys understand, right? @Francesca Lemon
didn’t even mind that much, we made up and we’re still friends. I mean. Not FRIENDS but you get what I mean.
Anyways, I know I can come off as abrasive sometimes. Nobody at school really knows me. I bet most of you don’t even know my last name. Or my real first name...
That’s why I’m asking everyone to join me in this new, fresh, student-run course. Financial Planning For The Psychically Adept. It would be a casual sort of thing, where we all can share advice and even just hang out really. I can explain everything that happened with my work and the graveyard, and everyone else can demonstrate how they manage their money too! It’ll be fun. People can bring snacks and stuff!
So yeah. Meet me in the west wing study tomorrow if you wanna know just how I paid off my dues for this year. (And the next year. And how I’m going to for the next 76 years.)
So, I’ve had an epiphany.
Obviously nobody trusts me anymore. After what I did with the family company and the graveyard and poor old @Francesca Lemon
and her poor old centipede eyes... I get it. I have to earn back your trust.
Which is why I’ve devised a little game! To bring in more member for our little student run club AND to create a fun opportunity for student bonding! Totally transparent, not at all suspicious, good old fashioned wholesome gambling!
The challenge is simple: guess my full name. Whoever gets closest wins a prize! A prize which may or may not have to do with the millions my family’s business has embezzled from our beloved school...
Anyways, that’s besides the point. Like I said: full disclosure, no more secrets. A surprise isn’t a secret, right?
I can’t wait to see how you guys all go about figuring out my identity. Well, guys and girls. And ghouls. And ethereal beings of light and antimatter, somehow coexistent despite the antithesis of their mutual proximity.
And, you know, everyone else. Financial Planning For The Psychically Adept is a course/club/student-led organization which prides itself on inclusivity.
Best of luck, my peers! Here’s to a fresh, completely honest, totally unsuspicious start!
- Lake (Or am I?)