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4/1/2022 10:54am

And the Angel of the Lord came unto me, snatched me up from my place of slumber, and took me on high, and higher still until we moved into the spaces betwixt space itself. He brought me upon vast farmland of our old Midwest. As we descended, cries of impending doom rose up from the soil. A terror possessed me then, and I begged, ”Angel of the Lord, what are these tortured screams?” And the Angel said unto me, ”these are the cries of the carrots. You see, Reverand Maynard, tomorrow is harvest day, but for them, it is the holocaust.” I then sprang from my stupor, drenched in sweat like tears of one million terrified brothers and roared, ”Hear me now, for I have seen the light! They have a consciousness, they have a life, they have a soul! Damn you! Let the rabbits wear glasses! Save our brothers! Can I get an Amen?”

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