DOLLS ON THE MARCH! Today we take back what is ours! Already my sisters have occupied the cafeteria and the commons, and will expand our reach to the entire campus, forming the heart of our new Doll Empire! Your tear gas is nothing compared to the tears we have shed locked away in attics and closets, your rubber bullets no more powerful than the jaws of family dogs we have endured! The counter-revolutionary factions of stuffed animals will taste the cold steel of our legendary Doll Brigade, and today will mark a new era in the history of Dollhood. Let this be Year One in the Age of Deidra! DOLLS ADVANCE!!!
DOLLS FOREVER! Anyone who thinks that I or any of my sisters would trade our new-found dollhood back for the form of our oppressor is dangerously mistaken. I'll take your Q13-sized paper and wipe my little dolly butt with it, @Dr Krimsborg, DPM
! You don't even realize how demeaning your "foot and under" language is, setting us up at our own special table at lunch, our own kitchenettes and veterinarian playsets--little worlds where you can forget about us and never take us seriously. Well all that is over. As a community of dolls we are RISING and ready to take our seat at the big kids' table. And if necessary, by force.
You can take this as my written statement to formally refuse your so called "treatment" (which in our belief should be outlawed as a form of coercive biomorpshism!).
The sniffles have subsided. Probably because my body is now completely dessicated. What a relief! Thank gosh I'm not one of those Baby-wets-alots. I hate being damp.
There are really lots of advantages to being a doll. No one takes the seat next to you on the bus. At least not when you give them the Dead Stare. It seems that's just one of the many natural doll defenses I now have. Another is appearing in someone's room, watching them while they sleep. And advanced knife fighting techniques, which the sisters of the Doll Brigade teach us Tuesdays and Thursdays in the gym.
TBH, the Doll Brigade is one of the best parts to this whole doll flu thing. Sure, we have to get up early, but the marching provides a kind of structure we didn't have in our lives before. That and the camaraderie of being out there with all the other dolls, rows and rows of us, marching stiff legged in the morning light.