Yup. There goes nothing.

There it goes again.

Still nothing.

Nothing speeding by.

It almost feels like I'm not moving at all.

Ok, it seems exactly like I'm not moving at all. Since there's absolutely nothing around me to gauge it by, I guess you could say I'm not moving at all. Or not any more than you are when you think you're standing still, because you're not. You're on a rock hurtling in a wide circle at 67,000 miles an hour, and that rock is spinning at 1000 miles an hour. But to you, you're sitting still, right?

Well same here.

In fact, I wonder what would happen if I just got up and turned to the left...

A ha! An exit sign.

"Hooooo-eeeet! Hooooo-eeeet!"

Junior Psychic Ranger Harlow gives us the sign she's in position, at the far end of the reality hole.

"Caw! Caw! Krikrikrikri!"

I answer back.

Then, both of our teams start pulling the quantum net closer, over the meadow and towards the edge of the gaping hole in reality. The goal is to v-e-r-y c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y pull the net into position, just this side of the event horizon, and secure it with cognitive gravity stakes. If we do it right, it should create a kind of trap -- like in a drain -- to catch anything before it can go through.

But if we get it wrong and it comes in contact with the even horizon, we've got to make sure we don't fall in after it.

We're all tied off on the biggest nearby trees, and anchored via memory belts we had to mediate for 3 hours to achieve. Now if we can just pull it off, like we did 100 times on the training field.

Closer... closer...

Oh dear. @Marian Day and her troop of Junior Psychic Rangers seem to have slipped off the map. Literally!

Inline with the Junior Psychic Ranger code, we needed to wait two weeks before making this announcement, as they were all quite clearly observed being sucked through the hole in reality. Which I made. I can't help but feel somewhat responsible!

Anyway, you need to give Junior Psychic Rangers two weeks to give them a chance to be contacted via seance, but, though we've held a table at the Spoon Bender every night, we've received no messages. Well, no messages from any of the Junior Psychic Rangers, at least. Someone drew the Ouija board on to the table with a sharpie, so it's become somewhat of an annoying magnet for all kinds of stray spirits, but none of them are presenting the appropriate call signs for Troop 227.

Alas! I'm afraid we're on the brink of calling in the Psychic Corps of Engineers to close up the hole, after which those brave rangers will have even a harder time getting back. If they haven't already been shredded by the terrific dimensional forces, or merely dying of boredom in the Great Nothings.

I'll still be holding court at the nightly seance till we have some kind of closure. Though I still need to wear my brainwave powered exoskeleton, such improvements have been made that both getting to the Spoon Bender as well as leading a seance are well within my power. Now that the metals in my exoskeleton have been properly grounded.

If you have any information through your own connections to The Great Beyond, we would be relieved to hear it.

Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator