Buffy Chan

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Worm Gardens
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4/6/2021 10:50pm

EXCERPTS FROM PROJECT WORMSIGN

definitelybuffy39982

(shaky and obscure phone video of dry grass and rocks)

The readings say it should be right around here somewhere... Have to be careful because I don't want to walk right into it, I could fall into another--- wait!

(camera shifts to a space up the hill, where a great brown nose is nudging up a rock)

THERE! See? I knew I could hear the worms under the earth. Have you ever stood around a wet lawn and heard the worms squirming through the mud? It's like that, but lower, and deeper. Also drier, since it's winter.

(the worm moves the rock aside, stretches out of the hole, and waves around in the air. it's a giant earthworm)

Ah, I've called a big one alright! Let's go take a closer look, shall we?

(the worm seems to notice Buffy approaching, then slips back into its hole)

They're shy. They really don't know their own size.

(the camera follows the ground for a short time, obviously forgotten by Buffy as she walks to the hole)

And... THERE! See it? Blacker than black, no light escaping, no depth... but watch...

(Buffy has turned the camera to the utterly black hole and throws a stick into it)

Bloop! Gone! Just like that. You couldn't even see it fall down the hole, because it's not a hole like that, it's more of a---whoops!

(the stick suddenly flies back out of the hole, landing on the nearby ground)

Oh! Sorry down there!

Anyway, computer, mark this GPS as Wormhole #998b, as per the Giant Intelligent Slug map. And we'll need to cordon off this whole area. Inform control.

Buffy out.