Ms. Hazeltine

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Back to School 2024
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8/31/2024 11:41pm

A new psychic school year is upon us already!

I swear I must be caught in some kind of time loop. Just this morning as I was on my phone during the annual Mircea Eliade Re-welcome Breakfast, I ran into pictures from last year's event and I was wearing the exact same dress! I really must be in some kind of rut.

Could that be why my dashingly infuriating gentleman friend @Seketus Reed continues to avoid any serious discussion of our relationship? Am I just too predictable? Well, predictably, he's off on another of his psychic spelunking adventures with yet another group of young interns. Maybe I just can't learn new lessons.

But you can! Sooooo many new lessons to learn! And the first of those lessons is "Don't be shy" and "Be honest!" and "Tell them how you really feel, before it's too late!"

Just add a journal entry to this story to share it with the group.

Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





Summer Session
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6/1/2024 1:59am

A great big welcome to all our summer session students, as well as those compelled to attend through the summer as part of their probationary discipline, and those from entirely different time frames as well.

Summer is a very special time of year here at Psychic High School, when we experience higher temperatures than ever, as well as more intense storms, rains, and high wind. And that's really just our own fault, not even related to global warming! Except perhaps as a contributor.

It's also a more intimate time on campus, as our student body isn't quite as big as during the rest of the school year, and many students just lounge around on hammocks or hang out at the pool without attending classes at all. We are slowly identifying those students and sending them home as we find them.

So, don't be mysterious! Introduce yourself here so everyone knows just what you're capable of, and if protective clothing may be necessary to interact with you wherever you might "hang out."

Speaking of hanging out, I'll be taking a few weeks off this summer to attend Psychic Love Counseling Camp with that scoundrel of a psychic spelunker who stole my heart, @Seketus Reed. I've given him one last chance to reconcile, and if this doesn't work for us he'll never dive this cave again.

Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





Say Hello!
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3/2/2024 10:54pm

Welcome new students! And returning students! As well as students emerging from their hibernation sarcophagi, those regrowing from seeds or stem cells, amnesiacs, somnambulists, and those who are mere fleeting thoughts being
dreamed by creatures from higher realities.

Psyhigh is a community of kindred spirits, and while many of us may enjoy hiding in our own dark caves, it's important to reach out to those around us and let them know who we are. At the very least it's important to
know exactly where they are and what your possible escape routes may be.

Speaking of hiding in dark caves, when we discover exactly where @Seketus Reed and his so called "teaching assistant" are doing their "research," they may just find their own escape routes have caved in!

But for those of us on campus, let's let it all hang out and share a bit about who we are and just what brought us to Psyhigh, shall we?

Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





Small complaints
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2/22/2024 11:52pm

Dear students,

As you are aware, Psychic High School has had generally unrestricted dress code for many years. This is partially to accommodate the wide range of physical forms our students (and staff) have, but also because the supplier that made our specially resilient uniforms had to close due to supply chain issues.

While the school remains largely unafraid of clothing, we are temporarily banning the wearing of "green jeans," or "jeans that are green." The school has learned that the wearing of "green jeans" is a sign of being involved with a criminal cult that has recently been targeting our botanical students and staff, not to mention the landscaping.

Any student found wearing "green jeans" will be asked to remove them immediately.

Don't get caught with your pants down! And leave your "green jeans" in your drawers till this arc reaches its satisfying conclusion.

Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





Who do you love?
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1/31/2024 11:40pm

Hello Students!

It's my most favorite time of the year -- when we are all given the freedom to express our true feelings to those we care most about! Whether they even notice can be a different affair, but I feel my sweetie @Seketus Reed's ice is just about to crack.

And it's the time for us all to express our appreciation, love, and respect for those around us. It doesn't have to be as romantic as Seketus and I's special relationship. Indeed, how could it be? But we can all find things to love about even the most banal people around us, and it's good to let them know. Once a year, anyway.

So this month, use this space to give a shout out to your most favorite students on campus and let them know how much they're appreciated. And why!

It's our month-long electronic Valentines Spectacular. Post your kudos today.

Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





Small complaints
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1/28/2024 10:24pm

As a matter of fact, @Mr. Blume, there has recently been a rash of incidents of students emptying their soda on plants around school. Green Monster Energy, Fierce Green Apple Gatorade, Mountain Dew... Sprite....

We had thought this was just indicative of a growing lack of respect for our environment and an increasingly commodified relationship to beverage consumption. "Kids will be kids," you know.

However, campus psycurity now believes there is a sort gang of mad scientist youth behind this pattern of attacks. Or perhaps a cult. You were merely the most sentient of their victims so far.

But not to worry! I'm sure the Psy Corps has things well in hand! You needn't be concerned about it happening again, and of course your recent leaf loss must be entirely unrelated.

Make sure to drink lots of clean, fresh water, and enjoy some sun!

Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





Small complaints
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1/23/2024 10:55pm

Well this certainly explains the missed staff meetings, @Mr. Blume!

Campus Psycurity has been informed and you can expect a full investigation into this matter. They will be coming by to check your pH levels as well.

Any students with information related to Mr. Blume's potting are encouraged to report it to Campus Psycurity, where they will receive full protection under the school's telepathic whistleblowing policy.

Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





New Year = New You
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1/1/2024 1:38am

Happy New Year to all our students, be they prospective, new, returning, ectoplasmic, extraterrestrial, mineral, silicon-based, data constructs, feral, or otherwise.

The start of a new year is an excellent time to concentrate on renewal, changing old negative habits and adopting new ones. I, for instance, am resolving to no longer let myself fall for a certain psychic geo-archeologer's lies and charm and consider the positive side of being a single person my age.

But you, you're young and at a very important and exciting stage of your life--that is, attending Psychic High School! So, please tell us a little bit about yourself and the last dream you can remember here. It will help everyone get to know you better. REALLY know you better.

Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





Psychic Gift Exchange
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11/30/2023 10:27pm

Happy holiday season to all our students!

As many of you know, I'll be using my built up vacation time to fill in the gaps between the paid holidays. My charming on again/off again psychic cave explorer "person of interest" Professor @Seketus Reed is taking me on a cruise to Muspelheim! So you won't have to worry about me keeping warm IF you know what I mean.

So, before I go, just two bits of housekeeping.

1. Those remaining on campus for the holidays will be fed soup.

2. Using the Psychic Santa app, you will be paired anonymously with a Psychic Santa Gift ID Number (your PSGIDN). Use your PSGIDN to identify the gift you select and place it in the display in the cafeteria. And NO peeking under all that wrap till Unboxing Day.

And now, Skeetus and I are off to meet with Surtr, the leader of tour group. See you next month!


Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





Seasonal Enrollment
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10/31/2023 10:47pm

Welcome Seasonal Students!

Ah, roasted chestnuts, pine and sage, rosemary and thyme and pumpkin spice. The school has a special arrangement with Psychic Yankee Candle Co. to bring that "new school" smell into the dorms this time of year. It also throws off the scent for any freelance Mind Hunters looking for an easy bounty.

We're glad you've made it this far, and Psychic High School will no doubt be a safe haven for you and your studies. Just so long as you keep your GPA up!

Whether you're new or already well-seasoned, introduce yourself here and tell everyone a little bit about yourself. Then get back to your studies.


Sincerely,

A. Hazeltine
Student Activities Coordinator





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