I really take offense to the term “invasive” because the connotation is not accurate in the case of me and my and my fellow giant intelligent slugs. We may visit new territories, but we don’t ravage or destroy or otherwise imbalance them.

Well, at least not ecologically.

On behalf of all the Giant Intelligent Slugs, I’d like to thank everyone for such a great turnout at the Valentine’s Dance last Friday. And formally apologize for the “lost time” some students may have experienced near the end there.

I think everybody can agree that the limbo contest and the hokey pokey were great fun, the slugballs were a fantastic “get to know you” time, and that we all learned a lot from the mucus excretion dance-off.

We just thought that releasing a little bit of the slug-enriched vapor from the Emission Tanks would add a “special something” to the night, and hadn’t considered any of the potential side-effects, neurochemical or otherwise.

No need to visit your school nurse!! We’re sure any lingering little quirks will be fading real soon.