Omai Gott

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Prof. Fakanami's Customer Growing Club
7/15/2015 9:26pm

Prof. Fakanami's Doppelgangers for Petsercise and More!

Hi. Does your pet need more exercise? Are you finding it harder and harder to move, encased in your virtual experience body suit? Too tired to remove the waste removal and nutrient input tubes yourself? Is little Fido beginning to gnaw at his own skin? Or possibly yours?

Then Prof. Fakanami's Freelance Doppelgangers for Petsercise and More may be exactly what you need!

Let our mostly-personalized doppelgangers take your little Butch or Missy out for the walk of his or her life, while you give your virtual life all the attention it deserves. Your pet will never know the difference - except that our doppelgangers all come with your choice of Winter Pine, Munchy Tangelo, or Spicy Taco scent.

But wait! There's more!

If your pet is lethargic, apathetic, or otherwise disinterested in the health benefits of exercise, then allow Prof. Fakanami to provide the Purrrrfect Doppelganger for your Pet as well! In no time, almost-perfect duplicates of both you and your pet will be tearing it up down at the dog park or cat gym, allowing both you and your pet to have the rest you deserve, exploring the outer limits of virtual pleasure that only bi- and quadruped virtual experience body suits can provide.

And with our Know it All (tm) brand Wi-Fi surveillance package (which comes standard in all our doppel models) you can tap right into the experience stream of your doppels as they make their way to healthy exercise heaven! And you won't even need to break a sweat!

So come on down to Prof. Fakanami's Customer Growing Club, conveniently located in the reconverted sub-basement of the student union, directly below the APSA offices. Take the fireman's pole, and let them know that Omai sent you, so you won't be tased or otherwise detained by our doppel security team.


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Prof. Fakanami's Customer Growing Club
7/3/2015 2:13pm

Freelance doppelgangers now with Mega-Ultra Security Plus!

Are you tired of your rented or leased doppelganger getting pwned by evil ancient entities from beyond time & space?

Has your party or court appearance been ruined one-too-many-times by malicious mental programming inserted into your unsuspecting proxy vessel?

Those days are over, my friends, with new Mega-Ultra Security Plus!

Mega-Ultra Security Plus is painless!

Mega-Ultra Security Plus is fun!

Mega-Ultra Security Plus is easy to install!

Mega-Ultra Security Plus more than pays for itself in terms of downtime and memory recovery costs associated with your hijacked doppelgangers.

Drop by Prof. Fakanami's Customer Growing Club main desk for more information on how to make your freelance doppelganger more secure today. We're now conveniently located in the APSA office space. Special thanks to @i am the champ for sharing his room with us, and we're sure the free freelance doppelganger rental he's receiving in return for his generosity is perfectly safe, and will in not in any way turn on him or any of its human masters.


Prof. Fakanami's Customer Growing Club
6/26/2015 1:01pm

Freelance doppelgangers available for rent by the hour or day. Ideal for parties, finals, court appearances, and witness protection scenarios. Find me in the basement of the psy-bio lab and I will set you up!